Textick

Outdoor cinema in Australia means:

- picnic blanket
- mozzie repellant
- cheap wine that tastes like the cardboard it is bought in
- cold chicken
- something to shield the screen, so that the sun (still high in the sky at 8pm) doesn’t bleed out the colour in the screen
- soft grass
- ants nibbling at your bare ankles
- a radio somewhere playing all Cold Chisel’s Greatest Hits

Outdoor cinema in London means:

- raincoats
- biting wind
- drizzle
- cheap wine from Spain that tastes damn good
- atmospheric DJ playing Kubrick-esque, psychedelia
- strange holiday light display before the film begins
- flagstone floor
- creepily front-lit statue of some admiral from somewhere staring down at you

But, at all cinemas, everywhere in the world, there’s always that group of teens who act like they’ve just found the key to their pappy’s liquor cabinet.

Must discuss every scene. Must repeat every key phrase. Must use mobile to photograph key ‘HERE’S JOHNNY!’ shot. Must start fighting with the girl who was sent an sms once, and never replied, and what are you getting angry with me for, you’re the one who didn’t reply, and fuck you, I’m not taking this, that’s it, I’m out of here!

Sighs of relief from the surrounding crowd. Talky McTalk-A-Lot is gone! Why oh why is there ALWAYS a TALKER in movies? I wonder if it’s possible to get a law passed, that says if you kill someone for talking during a movie, it’s considering a benefit to humanity. Ditto for people who a) forget to turn their phones off, and b) proceed to answer it and talk extremely loudly on the other end.

All in all, though, The Shining was a swell experience. Everything in London seems to be somehow transformed into a theatrical experience, and it was so great to sit, shivering, with numb bums, listening to the wails and wobbles of the DJ beforehand. Sends a chill down the most hardened of creep fans! And there was something so funny and surreal about us sitting in our daggy raincoats, giggling at very visible g-strings exposed through see-through raincoats! Photos are to follow!!

This entry was posted on Friday, August 25th, 2006 at 8:20 am and is filed under Journal. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.